January 3, 2022

Because of the Omicron covid variant, Easter Seals decided to close this week. After 5 days of being with John constantly, I was disappointed but certainly understood. Fortunately I'm off work this week so the timing worked well for us. But it deserves mention that when I received the call from the Easter Seals director, she thought I was at work and she immediately said that Edna would still be available to help John even though the program was closed. That's how amazing they are! Even when they close, they're still available to help us! Meanwhile, I'm trying to be patient with John. When you gear up for a break, and then the break doesn't come, somehow it's worse than if the break was never coming! I've already canceled a spa afternoon that I had planned with a friend later this week, but that can be done another time of course. We still have some appointments and plans for other days this week, so we'll stay busy. John really goes crazy when he's not busy. And that drives me crazy! I think John liked all the activities that come with Christmas. He was quieter than he's been in the past, but still happy to see people and have things to do. Ben and his girlfriend came to visit, and John really liked seeing Ben again. Ben noticed that his dad is less agitated than he was before, so I sang the praises of Seroquel. Numerous times each day John takes attendance. He wants to know who is home, or how many people are in the house. He often asks if people are coming over, and is disappointed when nothing is planned. He is easily bored, and when he's bored he seems to wallow in dark thoughts. He talks about needing to 'go somewhere', and announces he'll be dead very soon. Sometimes he asks how soon he's going to die, and I tell him that he's not dying any time soon, and neither am I. If he's not being too negative and I can tell he can take a joke, then I tell him that he'll only die soon if I kill him, so he'd better watch out!