November 12, 2023

It seems we are through the worst of the transition period. John is sleeping better now, and I think he's more comfortable with the caregivers there, and they with him. He paces around whenever he's awake, so it's a lot. Danielle said yesterday after a visit that she thought he was the best she'd seen him. He continued leaning to the left like the Leaning Tower of Pisa for about 2 weeks, but that seems to be resolved now. For the past week his feet, but mostly his left foot, have been swollen. The palliative care nurse believes it is Edema, so they're treating him for that, and trying to get him to put his feet up as much as possible. That's nearly impossible though because he's up pacing around so much of the time. There doesn't seem to be a good explanation for the left leaning or the swollen feet, so heck if I know. At least both are better now. The pallitative care staff have checked on him regularly and call me often with updates. I continue to feel the need to keep very close tabs on John, so I've visited him every day except one (when I went out of town for a girls trip - a beautiful weekend of wine tasting in Paso Robles). Maybe I'm having trouble giving up a little control. Or maybe I'm being vigilant. It's probably somewhere in between. I still feel the weight of responsibility for him and worry about him constantly. I've gone at different times of the day to see how things are. The staff are patient and positive with the residents. They told me they'll have a private room available for John soon. He won't care much about that, but it'll be a little nicer to visit when he has a room of his own. They keep the residents in the common area most of the time though - people are not hanging out in their rooms by themselves. But I take him to his room each time to check on things, take care of some grooming, and then before I leave we go back to the common area. It's also good to walk around the garden with him since the weather has been nice.